{"id":2876,"date":"2020-01-20T10:57:14","date_gmt":"2020-01-20T15:57:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/?p=2876"},"modified":"2020-01-20T11:27:26","modified_gmt":"2020-01-20T16:27:26","slug":"driving-the-difficult-driveway-of-life-by-gene-boyington","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/?p=2876","title":{"rendered":"“Driving the Difficult Driveway of Life,” by Gene Boyington"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Message given at Durham Friends Meeting, January 19, 2020<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"This<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Good Morning, Friends. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are lots of ideas about\nguidelines for the speaking part of worship and our oral ministry to ourselves\nand others. Here is a specific one and a general one:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Specifically, Never give Gene the\nmicrophone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Generally, here is a four-part one\nwith a title like those quartets that were ubiquitous back in 1940s and 1950s\npopular music:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is an old Quaker guideline for\nbeing heard and appreciated in Meeting. I call it the 4 \u201cS\u201ds, or Three Sues and\na Syd\ud83d\ude0a (Su, Su, Su, Sd):<\/p>\n\n\n\n

  1. Stand up (to be recognized);<\/li>
  2. Speak up (to be heard);<\/li>
  3. Shut up (to be appreciated);<\/li>
  4. Sit down (to be invited to speak\nagain).<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    **This\ncould be enough of a main message this morning, but try and stop me from telling\nyou my:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      Backing-out-of-the-driveway\nstory. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    In this story, there will be no names\nmentioned to protect the innocent, the guilty, and the pretty good relationship\nof the two!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    My driveway (pause), with which some\nof you are familiar, slopes slightly upward into the yard. It also bends\nslightly to the right as one proceeds up the incline. It\u2019s not long enough to\ndrive in, then turn around somewhere, then later drive out. We have to drive in\nand back out. Or we have to _back_ in to be able to _drive_ out. But that\nrequires forethought and determination. \nHarried from our time away, we are in a hurry to get resettled into the\ncomfort and calm of domesticity. So, we drive in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Later, when a new errand calls, we\nusually are (again) in a hurry, now to do what must be done in the bigger\nworld, we must back out. It is easy, when backing out, to forget the slope and\nthe bend, then wind up slightly to the north side of the driveway, or to have a\nmidcourse correction and oversteer into a slightly southerly position toward\nthe road end of the driveway. Straying off the northerly side of the driveway\nis problematic for the rock border of the flower garden \u2013 the rocks are taller\nthan the clear space under most moving vehicles\u2639. [It\nhas happened.] The southerly side usually is not much trouble, as straying off\nthe driveway would take one only into the lilac bush. [It, too, has happened.]<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    The aforementioned innocent, and\nguilty, have survived (so far) all the trials of navigation of the driveway.\nThey _are_ still enjoying that pretty good relationship\ud83d\ude0a. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    But recently, there was a snowstorm\nwith a lot of pretty wet snow, after which the newish snowblower broke most of\nits shear pins, and the replacements would take a week to arrive. So, the\ninnocent (or the guilty, we don\u2019t recall which) shoveled a vehicle width path\nin the driveway to permit traveling \u2013 in the bigger world. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Later in the day, it was time for one\nof those travels. The innocent (or the guilty, depending on one\u2019s current frame\nof mind) cranked up the car and began to back out of the driveway in the\nappropriate fashion. OOPS, quite completely stuck in the un-shoveled portion on\nthe southerly side of the driveway, not quite into the lilac bush. [innocent\nand guilty worked together (with help of four-wheel drive truck) to extricate\nthe car and get the innocent (or guilty) abroad in the bigger world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    How did this happen? Whichever\n(guilty or innocent) had this occur under their respective drivership, the\nother has had hardly ever such an occurrence. How does each of them negotiate\nbacking up \u2013 in this driveway, in other driveways, out of (or into) parking\nspaces? Could there be a difference that is significant? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    After much introspection by innocent\n(or guilty), there was this thoughtful conversation by both:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    When you back out of the driveway,\nwhere is your right foot? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    [Long pause] On the gas.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    [Long pause] Problem?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Yup. Brake, poised at the top of the brake pedal\u2019s travel. Let the car back down by itself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Uh-huh. Then, there is more time to\nwatch where the vehicle is going, being ready to apply the brakes, if needed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    OK, that\u2019s good\ud83d\ude0a<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Remember the slope? If we are backing\nuphill, we need to apply gas; downhill, be ready to brake. The car\u2019s automatic\ntransmission will power it backward ever so slowly, if we are on a downslope,\nor it might just roll.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Reflecting on this tale of woe and\nresolution, one might ask oneself:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cAm I a foot-on-the-gas person?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cOr am I a foot-on-the-brake person?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cDo I know when to steer \u2026 with my\nfoot on the gas, when to steer \u2026 with my foot on the brake?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cIs there more I could know, and can\nlearn, about making conscious choices?\u201d  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Somewhere in the Bible, there is a\nstatement about freedom of choice. Elsewhere in the Bible is commentary and\nimplication about what God gives us along with this life opportunity, how we\nuse what we are given, and the responsibility we have to make good, useful, and\neffective choices. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Message given at Durham Friends Meeting, January 19, 2020 Good Morning, Friends. There are lots of ideas about guidelines for the speaking part of worship and our oral ministry to ourselves and others. Here is a specific one and a … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":213,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2876","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-message"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9rLvf-Ko","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2876","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/213"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2876"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2876\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2879,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2876\/revisions\/2879"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2876"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2876"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.durhamfriendsmeeting.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2876"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}