Durham Monthly Meeting of Friends met for the conduct of business on Sunday, January 15, 2023, with 9 people attending from the Meetinghouse and 6 by Zoom.

1.     Meeting Opening

Clerk opened meeting with a moment of silent preparation                                                

2.     Review Agenda

        Clerk reviewed the agenda.

3.     Approval of Minutes of December 2023 — Ellen Bennett

                  Minutes were approved.

4.     Ministry and Counsel — Renee Cote, Tess Hartford

Meeting Care Coordinator (MCC)

The Meeting Care Coordinator position description was read. Pastoral Care, which had been an MCC responsibility in the job description written for the new MCC position 2+ years ago, was removed and will remain solely with M&C.

Clerk noted that members were supportive of the description, but not yet clear for approval. Review and approval of the MCC position will be taken up again at the next monthly meeting for business (February).

Members were asked to think about those who should be on the MCC supervisory committee.

Members approved the description of the Search Committee for the MCC. Clerks are asked to ask members of their committees to consider serving on the MCC search committee.

The MCC job description will be attached to the minutes for distribution.

Proposal for Technology for the Meetinghouse

Clerk asked committee Clerks to review the proposal submitted by Craig Freshley regarding tech support for the Meeting. Clerk noted especially the gratitude we all feel towards Craig for helping to set up the technology that allows us to attend meeting via Zoom. The proposal Craig submitted will be taken up at the February meeting for Business.

Request was made to hold M&C members in the light, with gratitude for all of the work they have taken on.

5.     Trustees — Sarah Sprogell

Sarah Sprogell summarized the annual report submitted for this meeting. The report was submitted for information.

Clerk shared tremendous gratitude for the care given and attention paid by the Trustees for the meetinghouse and cemeteries, as well as stewarding the gifts that this Meeting has been given. Trustees have, in this way, supported the entire Durham Monthly Meeting community.

Doug Bennett reviewed a financial summary of the costs to maintain the Meetinghouse and grounds over time. He noted especially the difference between capital and operating costs, and offered ways to think about finding the funds for on-going capital expenses.

Concern was expressed for the number of members who read and understand reports like this — those distributed in advance of Monthly Meeting for Business. The reports are important. Clerk noted that 5th Sundays may be used for listening sessions around particular topics of concern and could address this concern.

The suggestion was made to take 10 minutes of a future Business Meeting to take a “tour” of the DFM website so that all may know where to find important material.

M&C is asked to take on the scheduling of 5th Sundays, including a session on our values and leadings and how those are reflected in the spending of funds.

The Meeting expressed it gratitude for the transparency that both the Finance Committee and Trustees have given with respect to the Meeting’s finances.

6.     Peace and Social Concerns — Ingrid Chalufour

A verbal update was given. Items to note include a letter to go to Brunswick Town Council regarding re/naming of the 250th Anniversary Park. Wendy Schlotterbeck will be meeting with the committee regarding settlement of refugees in our community. The committee is also seeking advice from the Wabanaki about ways to support their sovereignty. The committee is delighted that teachers involved in the Social Justice Enrichment Project will be gathering in person in the Meetinghouse to discuss their work.

7.     Proposed Minute from Falmouth Quarterly Meeting                              

Clerk is not necessarily asking for approval of this minute, which will be approved by Quarterly Meeting at the end of January. The minute did not arrive in enough time for deep consideration. Clerk read the minute, which is attached.

            Members approved and unite with the minute.                                                        

Clerk noted that when federal legislation was submitted to allow Wabanaki tribes in Maine to qualify for future federal programs. it was opposed by our U.S.Senators,  They wanted the matter to involve the State and the tribes directly. We continue to support these efforts.

8.     Representatives to Falmouth Quarterly Meeting 1/28/23

Clerk asked for those interested in attending Falmouth Quarterly Meeting. Mey Hasbrook and Kim Bolshaw indicated their interest.

Members approved and Mey and Kim were appointed as our representatives to Falmouth Quarter on January 28.     

9.     Communications Update                                                                                                    

The Committee Clerk noted that the committee is transitioning at the moment, and working to clarify different processes, including those for distributing the Newsletter and posting Friends’ Notes.

To aid in this work the Committee intends to establish a “new” email address that is particular to the Communications Committee, thus freeing personal email addresses of committee members.

The Committee will put together guidelines for Friends’ Notes, and other forms of communication, which will be included in the Meeting Handbook.

There was a question about the committee composition which was referred to the Nominating Committee for clarification.

New Business

      None

10.   Correspondence — Leslie Manning

In closing, Clerk read a letter of thanks from a new recipient of DFM funds: QUNO (Quaker United Nations Office) in NYC.

Respectfully submitted, Ellen Bennett, Recording Clerk

Attachments:

23.01.15 Agenda for Meeting For Business- Proposed.pdf

23.01.15 M&C Report.pdf

23.01.03 Durham Friends In-Meeting Audio Options.pdf

23.01.15 MCC position proposed.pdf

23.01.15 Trustees Annual Report 2022.pdf

23.01.15 Proposed FQM Minute on Tribal Sovereignty.pdf

Durham Monthly Meeting of Friends met for the conduct of business on Sunday, December 18, 2022, with 9 people attending from the Meetinghouse and 6 attending by Zoom

1.     Meeting Opening

Clerk opened the meeting with a few moments silent worship. The agenda was reviewed with the addition of the approval of the November minutes.                                                                                                              

2.     Approval of Minutes of November 2022 — Ellen Bennett

            Minutes were approved with two small corrections.

3.     Nominating Committee — Linda Muller

The slate of committee members for the coming year was distributed. Leslie Manning agreed to continue to serve as Clerk through 2023, and left the meeting while this recommendation was discussed.

            Members approved.

It was noted that Leslie had asked for a co-Clerk this past year. The Nominating Committee has been exploring this, but no one has come forward. Nominating Committee will continue to keep this on their agenda.

Members of all standing committees were reviewed. It was noted that Nancy Marstaller’s name should be added to the Tech Support Team. 

Sarah Sprogell shared that she has felt called to step down as Auditor, and announced this intention.

Clerk noted that additional suggestions might be made by email as well.

The Meeting membership wishes honor those who have contributed their time and expertise by serving on Durham Monthly Meeting Committees, and taking on individual roles to assist the Meeting in its work.

4.     Ministry and Counsel — Tess Hartford, Renee Cote

The request was made to re-introduce after-meeting refreshments, beginning with liquid refreshment only, based on protocols introduced at Portland Friends Meeting. The suggestion was made that the air purifiers could be moved to the Gathering Room after meeting for worship. Trustees will work on the logistics of moving the air purifiers.

Members approved.

5.     Finance Committee — Sarah Sprogell

The draft 2023 budget was updated from last month’s reading. Expenses exceed income as in the previous draft, a result of keeping expense lines for hiring a Meeting Care Coordinator and/or Youth Minister.

      Members approved the 2023 budget.

Helen Clarkson left a bequest of $5,000 to be used at the Meeting’s discretion. It is currently in our checking account. Traditionally, we tithe 10% of any gift to add to the Charity Account, which in this case would be $500. The Finance Committee recommends adding $2,000 to the Charity Account. The remaining $3,000 of the bequest would remain in our General Account. Requests for funds from the Charity Account have been infrequent, but in the last four years, several gifts of $1,000 have been distributed. With this in mind, the Committee thought this would be a good opportunity to bring the total in the Charity Account to over $10,000.

      Members approved.

6.     Request for Funding                                                                                 

A special request for funding was brought forward to support the work of local organizations in the Lewiston-Auburn area with refugee and asylum-seeker housing. Clerk noted the definition of an Emergency Request from Meeting handbook: the request does not need to be seasoned for 2 meetings.

Finance and Peace & Social Concerns have been in conversation about this request for over a month. A total of $5000 is being requesting for the Immigrant Resource Center of Maine ($3,500) and to the Maine Immigrant and Refugee Services ($1,500). These are small and important organizations that are often overlooked when funding is distributed from other sources. The suggestion was made for funds to be used by each organization as it sees fit.

The Finance Committee looked to various funding sources as they considered this request, as it is larger than usual. The Committee recommends we use the Bernice Douglas fund, which is capable of meeting the request amount.

       Members approved.

With thanks to those who brought this to our attention and care.

7.     Trustees Report — Sarah Sprogell

        Report was submitted to update members. Nothing for approval.                                       

8.     Peace and Social Concerns — Ingrid Chalufour

Oral report given to update membership. Noted particularly was the capital campaign for Tedford Housing, with encouragement to members to give their support.

9.     New Business

Christmas Eve service is scheduled for 4:00 p.m., with Leslie Manning serving as tech support, Jo-an Jacobus as Care of Worship leader, and Kim Bolshaw taking care of heat!

Clerk closed the meeting for business with an expression of tremendous gratitude for the Meeting, the health of the budget, for the work of so many members. Clerk read a thank-you letter from Ellis Noetzel, for the Meeting’s assistance in sending her to Friends Camp this past summer.

The meeting ended with silent worship.

Respectfully submitted, Ellen Bennett, Recording Clerk

Attachments:

Attachments for DMM 22.12.18

approved by Monthly Meeting for Business, December 18, 2022

corrected and approved, December 18, 2022

Durham Monthly Meeting of Friends met for the conduct of business on Sunday, November 20, 2022, with 10 people attending from the Meetinghouse and 5 by Zoom.

1.     Meeting Opening

Clerk opened the meeting with a reading from 1985 Faith and Practice, 11th month queries on social responsibility, which served to reinforce this morning’s message, as well as reflections on Thanksgiving.                        

2.     Approval of Minutes of October 19, 2022 — Ellen Bennett

                 Minutes were approved as presented, with thanks.

3.     Peace and Social Concerns — Ingrid Chalufour

Ingrid read the Peace and Social Concerns report to update Meeting members. The committee has been active! Clerk noted that Meeting has not been collaborating with the Friends Committee on Maine Public Policy, and urges members to pay attention to their work, specifically as it relates to the Wabanaki.

Clerk also noted that Cush Anthony is rotating off as our representative to the Maine Council of Churches, with deep appreciation for his service.

4.     Finance Committee — Nancy Marstaller

Nancy noted that this is the first reading of the 2023 budget. A deficit budget was presented for the first time due to the following: With respect to expenses, salaries for both a Meeting Care Coordinator and a Youth Minister are included. With respect to income, weekly contributions have been down this year, as well as automatic deposits as a result of a decrease in membership. There were no comments or questions, so the budget will come before the Meeting in December for approval.

5.     Trustees Report — Sarah Sprogell

The Trustees report was presented to update members on their work. Clerk referenced the discussions Meeting has had about joining a solar farm and asked if Trustees might be able to continue to explore this. Trustees have the issue on their long-term agenda, but also requested that if anyone is looking into solar farms for their home, and have done some research, that they be willing to lend a hand to Trustees. Great thanks was expressed to Trustees for all of their work.

6.     Ministry and Counsel — Renee Cote, Tess Hartford

The report presented updates for members. Noted particularly was the benefit of the special called meeting and its value to members. Regarding clarification of tasks for a Meeting Care Coordinator, the job description is and continues to be developed by M&C and will be brought forward to Monthly Meeting. More discernment will follow.

In addition, M&C stated the Meeting’s commitment to holding a Christmas Eve service.

7.     Nominating Committee — Linda Muller

Jo-an Jacobus was brought forward for Library Committee for a 3-year term.

                Members approved.

Dan Henton is to continue to serve on Trustees for one year. This would be an exception as he has already served 2 terms. Dan’s service will return for approval in 2023.

                Members approved.

Mey Hasbrook was brought forward to serve on M&C for a 3-year term, beginning January 2023.

                Members approved.                                                                                              

Ellen Bennett to serve as Recording Clerk for 2023.

                Members approved.

Susan Gilbert was brought forward to serve on the Events Committee (a sub-committee of Christian Education).

                Members approved.

David Dexter will continue to assist Margaret Copeland with LACO responsibilities

Kristna Evans was brought forward to serve on Velasco Sister City Committee, a joint committee with Portland Friends Meeting.

                Members approved.

The Committee continues to seek a Meeting co-Clerk, as well as a monitor for cemetery funds. Member is currently in discernment about joining Finance Committee.

Clerk noted that the challenge of finding Meeting members and attenders to serve on committees is common among many Meetings. Clerk went on to say that the Meeting as a whole will continue to look for ways to find committee members to carry out our important work. The recommendation was made to have another called meeting to explore ways forward.

New Business

8.     Request from Velasco Sister City Committee.

The Committee is asking for donations for those who are traveling to Cuba. A collection box and a list of needed items will be in the Gathering Room. The request was made to post the list on-line. 

                The Meeting approved the collection of donations or supplies to be taken to Cuba.

9.     Youth Account Proposal — Wendy Schlotterbeck

Clerk read the proposal for transferring remaining funds in the Youth Account. Wendy requested that the funds be transferred to Peace & Social Concerns for the Social Justice Enrichment Project. The recommendation will be handed over to the Finance Committee for seasoning. The Finance Committee will return with the 2023 budget for review and approval in December.

                Members approved.

With no other items to come before the meeting, Clerk asked for a moment of silent worship and thanksgiving.

Respectfully submitted, Ellen Bennett, Recording Clerk

Attachments (available here):

Proposed Agenda

Minutes from October Meeting for Business

Peace and Social Concerns Report

Trustees Report

Ministry and Counsel Report

Nominating Committee Report

Finance Committee Proposed Budget for 2023 (first reading)

Youth Account Proposal

On October 30, 2022, Durham Friends Meeting held a facilitated listening session to consider how we have felt after five years of being a pastorless meeting. In the first half of the session we reflected on what brought each of us to DFM and what keeps us coming back; in the second half, what we see for DFM moving forward. No decisions were made. Ministry & Counsel will consider the thoughts expressed today and report back. — Renee Cote

Comments are paraphrased.

First half

Leslie: Everyone has a story. I attended a church supper at a vital Presbyterian church, whose mission is motivated by Matthew 25 and which has effective outreach. I encountered a woman who told me she came to DFM in the 80s, single and pregnant, and how much she appreciated our support. Her beliefs aren’t necessarily my beliefs but we were there for her.

Silence.

Linda: I knew I was a Quaker from attending other meetings. I came to DFM and heard a sermon by Ralph Greene. I was not used to programmed meeting and found it a little disappointing. But I felt the spiritual community and it was a good place to bring my children. I keep coming for the sense of spiritual community. I would like more multigenerational events.

Kim: I came to DFM for the wonderful dinners. It was close by and my kids could meet persons of all ages in a relaxed setting. I kept coming because the community felt genuine. I had no religious background or training. I have learned a lot and received much support.

David: I was raised an evangelical Baptist. I studied Quaker writers in college. I then went to an Episcopal church and I liked the quiet. I was confirmed but began to have doubts about the theatrical aspects of the service. I kept a journal 50 years ago while working on Mt. Washington and wrote that inside I felt like a Quaker. I felt affirmed by my contact with Clarabel although I continued as an Episcopalian until six or seven years ago. Friends have meant so much and I feel like DFM is the best of both worlds (programmed/unprogrammed). I feel that the Quaker ladies in the walls are still speaking to us. Jonathan Vogel-Bourne affirmed that I have always been a Quaker and said, “Welcome home.”

Martha: I came to DFM with my parents. I have wandered and experienced many kinds of meetings and worship. I appreciate the hybrid nature of worship at DFM.

Ann: Pastor Stephen (last name?) invited single persons who were attending DFM to dinners at the parsonage. He reached out to us. I transferred from Brunswick to Durham. I was more active but physical circumstances now keep me away. I feel a connection to people here and a sense of belonging.

Leslie: I came because I was invited. I was feeling anger at God and wanted to work on that relationship. Childless people can find it hard to make connections. At the time DFM had a food distribution program for persons of all income levels. Tommie Frye asked for my help moving boxes and Sarah invited me in. This community offered safe space and safe harbor from damage from other religions. Durham helps healing.

Doug: I am a convinced Friend. I’ve had experience of a wide variety of unprogrammed meeting, including Philadelphia with its meaningful worship. When I moved to Maine I wanted to join Brunswick but eventually felt there was not enough of the spiritual life I needed in a small meeting with little vocal ministry. I came to DFM and enjoyed the rich voices and the pastor. Doug Gwynn followed . . . I know that God is with us and people are feeling that and acting upon it.

Ingrid: Doug brought me. I identified as a Quaker and I had come to the point where I wanted more spiritual nourishment. Doug recommended DFM. I found spiritual nourishment and liked the messages. I enjoyed the varied voices. I have found a place to practice spirit here. Sukie recommended me for Peace and Social Concerns and I’ve stayed there.

Wendy: I visited DFM with my family in 1992. I had been in another faith community and in 2003 I wanted a change. Sunday morning church was a given in our family and my children wanted to come here. They were welcomed. In 2008 I became a member and then youth minister. I figured out the Quaker structure. The kids gave life. Climate and racial justice is my passion and I have received support from the MM, QM, and YM. I have met some wonderful people and I love this community very much.

Tess: I was born and raised Catholic. I came to Quakerism after the pastor at St. John’s in Brunswick with whom I had a close spiritual connection was rotated out. When I came to Durham I had had a bad faith group experience. Sukie invited me here 35 years ago. I have often felt like an outlier but I fit in here. I believe that small is beautiful and it’s how we make connections. A small group offers the intimacy for spiritual growth. I have been taught to listen deeply in this spiritual home.

Cush: I became a Quaker in 1967 through a college girlfriend in Virginia Beach Meeting. Later with my first wife I became a member of Portland Meeting for ten years. After divorce I began attending Allen Avenue Unitarian along with my second wife.  It was a good experience. Upon her death I went back to my Quaker roots. With my present wife I came to DFM. It has taken some time over the past three years to get used to a semiprogrammed meeting. I wanted to belong to a church in my geographical community, as community is defined these days. I still feel a little outside but I am integrating.

Second half—What would we like to see, what do we see? Should we hold conversations with those who aren’t here regularly? What do we do well, what can we do better?

Linda: We provide a safe space. We are here every Sunday even with small numbers. Our meeting is important for those needing healing or seeking mentorship.

Mey: I hear Leslie question where are we growing and where are we resisting. I have considered my expectations around meeting versus what happens in life. I’ve had varied experiences with Friends in different places. I chose DFM over Portland or Washington state. We are growing in love and compassion and after feeling discomfort. My interaction with Bob Eaton has become affirming, for example. I experience the prompting of spirit and love to help, and I experience love from meeting.

Dan: I was born into this church and I had to come here. I was assigned to pick up Mildred and I dreaded it at first but it became something I looked forward to. I enjoyed hearing her story. We developed a friendship outside of our usual roles. I did her good. Why would someone want to join DFM? To do some good for everyone here.

Cush: This has been a wonderful session and chance to sit down and share. I hope for more opportunities like this.

Tess: What are we doing well? We should give ourselves a pat on the back for what we have gone through. Tech has helped us to continue. Do we appreciate that we have been able to gather? As a member of M&C I have grown beyond what I thought was my comfort level.

Some people genuinely wanted to figure out how to bring technology into meeting and others feared it would change meeting. We can now choose how to be here, Zoom or in person. I’m happy I could paint the beautiful wall to see everyone on.

Ann: Like Tess I am grateful for Zoom even though I don’t like it. Covid has been hard with many losses of people. I feel part of meeting even though not there physically.

Sarah: We are good at being welcoming. I felt welcomed even as an outsider. I bonded with people I felt were the opposite of me in some ways. I learned from the elders’ forbearance, and to allow space while clerking. The elders modeled that love when we disagree. There’s been an enormous transition here at DFM and a chaotic world. So this is a test.

It’s hard when we’re not in unity. Some more listening sessions would help us hear each other. This creates good roots to help in addressing difficult issues.

Kim: I agree that we are very good at making space, being willing to listen, being sincere when it’s not easy. I have many opportunities to speak about Friends in the outside community. We need more ways to share our message of kindness, joy and love.

Leslie: With the passing of some members I’ve had a chance to see how our values of love and tolerance get transferred and passed into families. People react deeply to being in this space that feels like home. People feel seen and held. 

Can we draw some people back, those who keep up their membership or get the newsletter? How do we maintain the outer circle? To attract young families can we go to the families and offer our help? Some are adrift, how to help? Those who are carrying burdens or have the patterns of their lives change, can we release them? How should we nourish our roots?

Sarah: It would be beneficial to have future listening sessions, and useful to gather at intervals to check in where we are.

Mey: There are meetings for healing on the first Thursday of the next two months through Portland Meeting, at DFM in person or through Zoom.